Monday, June 1, 2009
In these times, 3 months seem a little long, but at times I wonder if we are just becoming too fast. Should we try and set personal timelines or should we just "go with the flow?". Older women always say "don't give away the milk or he won't buy the cow." But with friends and benefits situations that are turning into real relationships, what are we to believe?
I've heard of people marrying after two months, hell, there are reality shows with people looking for husbands and wives based on NO prior informations on the other. I thought relationships have to have a fountion to last. Maybe that's why the divorce rates are so high....no house will last without a solid foundation. I admit its been tepting to rush into relationships but I personally am choosing to take my time and truly learn the other person.
But back to the topic, how likely is it that a fast paced relationship will last? So my thoughts to leave you all with is just try and take your time with people. Remember, the first few months are the "honeymoon" phase I like to call it, which is when they can do no wrong and your just infatuated. If it is meant to be now, it will be later also.
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I think that honesty (in a nice way) is a form of good manners. Especially when dealing with friends. A good friend will tell you if you have lipstick on your teeth, a good friend will tell you when you have hair sticking up like Alphalpha, a good friend will tell you if that dress is not "for you"....but is it a good friends' job to tell you if they don't like your boyfriend and why?
On one hand you just want to look out for your friend. You don't want to see them hurt and usually you just want to send them words of cautions. BUT we all know love makes people do crazy things and so this may cause the friend to take it too personal as if she's being attacked. Sometimes she will instead of investigating HIS motive and actions to see if you are right, she will start to mistrust YOU and feel that you are trying to run her relationship.
With that said do you risk a friendship and tell her the truth, or do you keep your mouth shut and watch her make mistake after mistake with this guy? Let's be honest YOU are going to be the one hearing about all this drama (which couldve been prevented). Also let's be honest again, even if you tell her you don't like him, chances are she will still be with him....seems like a lose/lose. I've definelty lost friends because of their boyfriend...but I guess at the end of the day, a REAL friend will respect your honesty and choose whatever she feels right. Why can't all my friends have amazing boyfriends?!? Lol
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Wednesday, May 20, 2009
I like this guy and he says he likes me too! He's really nice, a sweetheart; I light up when I'm around him, talking to him, or even thinking about him. He makes me happy and he says i make him happy too! Everything seems to be going along very well... And guess what?!? I have no complaints! LOL!
With us things are very simple and uncomplicated. I love spending time with him - truth be told, he can always make me smile. Now whats the point of all of this, only to say: DON'T SETTLE! If you are looking for something in particular dont settle for less than that. I was craving real, honest happiness and I finally found it. Now that doesnt mean this current relationship is the end all be all but like the song says "... if not, you are the prototype". Now that I have happiness, I can't accept anything else.
Now I'm not advocating that you leave current/future relationships for any small thing, but if it's impotant to you than you should make sure you have it. As for me, I can't wait for this relationship to develop further, I'm so excited to see where it goes.
Singing Ashanti "I'm so happy" lol
That's what she said...
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Well, I'd never want to see you unhappy I thought you'd want the same for me
Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do
I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning Without you on my mind
So you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just fine
Did I make it that easy
to walk right in and out of my life?
I don't know why but this song was on my mind today. I've loved this song since the first time I heard it and for my life I find this song to be so true.
Which got me wondering which one is more painful: ending a relationship with an ACTUAL lover, or: ending things with an ALMOST lover.
Well since I only have expertise on ALMOST lovers I believe I'm biased to choose the latter. Real break ups, I imagine are hard. But I feel like the love that once was shared kind of numbs some of the pain because there was a point in time when love was present between the two parties.
Now ALMOST lovers are different. These things are messy and usually never a 50/50 love (that Teddy Pendergrass sings of) . Usually one party (the female) is under the impression that things are more than what it actually is. She has developed true feelings for him. She has invested her time and care....and sometimes love to the (pseudo)relationship. All the while the "relationship" is always on eggshells because at any given moment he can up and leave, he can date whoever, he can do his own thing and guess what? You can't do ANYTHING about it because you are not his girlfriend.
So when things don't work out, the pain is immense and typically there will always be unanswered questions.
But I digress, anyways the point is Almost Love is a tricky thing. I try now to stay away from it. But, if he like it then he shoulda put a ring (okay at least a TITLE) on it!
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I envied her for a second because I wished that I felt the same way. I love happiness, I love freedom, I love long walks on the beach (really) but I don't necessarily love LOVE. Indeed I am interested in the topic of love, I'm infatuated at times with the idea and I am extremely curious about every aspect of love but I am not in love with love.
So what exactly does that make me? And what exactly does that mean for my future love life? Does it mean I am not capable to love to the full capacity? Or am I just being dramatic again?!?
Well there were two main differences between my friend with whom I conversed briefly with about it: she had a boyfriend . I didn't (usually don't). And now that I think about it I am afraid to some degree of falling in love. And maybe that fear is the thing hindering me from being a hopeless romantic. Until I get over it or until someone eases that fear, I will be. Probably be a hopeless NoMantic.
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Sunday, May 3, 2009
Todays SATC quote:
"Are we simply romantically challenged, or are we sluts?"
What's your opinion on this one? I often feel romantically challenged and I've talked to quite a few guys in my days but ask me how many relationships I've had???? Well no don't ask me I'm embarrassed. What does that say about me? Is it me? Is it them? Am I just sugarcoating slut?lol. Well I wouldn't go that far.
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As we all know the world of dating is confusing, which brings me to todays topic: EXPECTATIONS. Especially in the beginning, is there a certain amount that one should have in order to not get heart broken???
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Yes you my friend are CRAZY!!!! But don't feel bad. I've come to the conclusion that every woman on earth is CRAZY some obviously more than others, but I digress. Anyways you are crazy and its coming out bit by bit. At what point do you show him the crazy?!?
I myself am finding this process very hard. Which lead me to ask: do you show a guy your crazy in the beginning and see if he accepts you or do you wait a while and spring it on him crossing your fingers that he will stay?
My personal story is that I am one that "walks to the beat of a different drummer" my best friend calls me an alien (not the illegal kind the ones from space.lol) anyways the point is I'm a little different. I swear sometimes I'm bipolar, I could possibly have multiple personalities that switch up by the second and I change my laugh more than I change my draws....but he doesn't know any of this. Is hiding my crazy really hiding who I am?
This question is the reason that I soon will be coming out of the crazy closet.lol. Because I feel like I'm hiding a part of my true self to him and he can never like me for me when he doesn't even know and accept the other side(s) of me. I guess I've toned it down and tried to be as normal as possible. I've found though that that normal ish is boring! I can't do it. Even if it scares him away I think its better that I start to release the quirky alien that I am :)
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Monday, April 27, 2009
***Today, I was sitting next to the guy I like and he was doing homework. Then, he looks up, his eyes meeting mine. His smooth voice mutters my name as his face inches closer to mine. I can feel his minty breath against my face. My pulse is racing. Then, he says "What's a pronoun?" FML
***Today, is my boyfriend and my 3 year anniversary. We decided to give each other something that we really needed. I bought him the $300 worth of books that he needed for college. He surprised me with a workout video and exercise equipment. FML
***Today, I met a really cute guy at work. He asked for my number, and I wrote it down on a piece of paper. After looking at the paper, he crumpled it up, yelled "Do you think I'm stupid? I know the rejection hotline when I see it", and walked away. It was my real phone number. FML
I'm sorry but stuff like this CRACKS me up.
Check them out:
Also if ur super bored check out:
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Thursday, April 23, 2009
We must first go over the extremely FRAGILE state of the male ego. A lot of people believe that women are the weaker of the two sexes....WRONG! It is true we can become psycho paranoid suicidal hot messes.coms lol. And we get hurt, we get lied to, cheated on, straight up played used and abused. BUT we get over it for the most part. We carry that weight for a little while. The smart ones learn from there mistakes. Usually us women can go from a bad situation and recover when the time is right then allow ourselves to be vulnerable enough to try another relationship out despite the possibility of being played again.
This is harder for men. Especially when they loved a girl that did them wrong. Once you've truly broken a mans' heart, it may take a lifetime to repair. He is now damaged goods. Sure he can enter another relationship but thanks to HER he can never give %100 to a new relationship.
This is when you are paying for her. Looking thru my old journal, I realized that I seem to always get those damaged goods. I, like some of you am a genuine, honest, trustworthy person of my word. I feel like a pretty good catch. But I feel like guys would treat me as if I couldn't be trusted and that's a total insult to me and my character.
So basically my point is for the guys reading this is to realize that we are not all alike. We're not all out to play you guys. That's all.
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That's what she said!
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Tuesday, April 21, 2009
So when I like someone it makes it that much harder for them to truly like me back. The worse part is I know the problem and I know the solution and yet still this wall is not chipping away like I want it to.
I guess the whole wall is up in the first place as a defense mechanism. I put this wall up, nobody gets close to me, I don't get hurt. End of story....BUT who really wins in that situation? Not I.
And so now its time I realized recently to finally get out the sturdiest of hammers and face a challenge I've never really faced before: breaking down that damned wall! That wall is my security blanket.
It is my excuse for when things don't go right....and things don't go right because of it! I guess the fear of actual rejection is what scares me the most. Without that wall, I'm exposed. If he doesn't like me what do I blame it on? But how can he really like me with the wall between us?
Its scary, but I need to do it. For my own happiness.
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Ive really been thinking about this and I began to wonder what is an "okay" or "average" number to have. I know alot of people with lots of different experiences, some who are still virgins, but I wonder what most people who are 21-22 have as there number. (if you don't know what number I'm talking about check the previous post)
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Monday, April 13, 2009
I had a very interesting weekend. I chilled with a man friend of mine (who happens to read this blog!!) and we talked about music, sex, relationships, and our current boy/girl situations. Good times.
To be honest, we used to talk last year but we kinda fell apart because I got really stressed with juggling my internship and school work. Plus, the distance made it more difficult to keep in contact. But he is a great guy that I really did like. What I liked the most about him was his honesty. He always kept it funky from the beginning. For example, he told me that he was messing with a girl at his school when we were talking. His honesty was refreshing because I knew what to expect from him..I knew the limits...so he never disappointed me and my feelings were never hurt. I was confident in him liking me because he wouldn't lie about it. Some referred to him as an "asshole", actually he referred to himself as such, but I would rather him be that than a liar.
Now I'm involved with a guy (who doesn't read the blog) who I don't think is very honest. Actually, he is a liar. But I can't judge him because I have definitely lied to him before. But to be honest, I wish honesty was something that we had established in the beginning of our "friendship". Instead when we are together, we live in this fantasy world like its just the two of us when we know its not. I wish we were honest with each other. Now I get headaches because I have to assess everything he does to find some truth. If we had honesty, we would have limits instead of fantasies and feelings wouldn't be hurt, and there would be no disappointments.
Honestly, the truth does hurt. But, I miss that honesty. I need it. I appreciate it. Because when its the truth you want to hear...u don't doubt it for a second..and you r finally happy and secure. When he tells you he wants to be with you...he means it 110 percent.
That's what she said...
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Last week on my way home at 1O pm, I got a seemingly urgent phone call from a male friend that I don't even speak to that often. He said that he needed me to come over to his house because he had some girl issues that he desperately needed help with that night.
Being the good friend that I am I tried my best to just get him to tell me over the phone what the issue was...but he claimed that this matter needed to be dealt with in person and that if I came he'd even give me gas money for my troubles.
Now the nosy side of me began to kick in so I said I'd come BUT only staying no more than ten minutes. I'm like maybe he got somebody pregnant, maybe he got some std or maybe even killed a hooker for all I know.lol
I get there and his sorry behind sits at the table and had the AUDACITY to ask me and I quote: " What does it mean when a girl you're with looks at another guy while with you?". At this point I'm BOILING MAD! Like who does that? How gay was that? Who cares? Why was it that serious? Why would he ever waste my time? Why the F would I care? Those were the things that came to my mind along with a few choice words for him.
So still being the friend that I am I gave him an answer to his raggedy question and I said " she probably: SLEPT WITH HIM or WANTED TO SLEEP WITH HIM . Yeah I said that. And then I took my money he owed ( raggedy 3 dollars) and left.
So why would a person be so evil and waste my time/life like that? This may be mean of me but should I stop being his friend for good???
(side note two times we've gone out (not like that) but both times I drove and both times I left him. )
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It seems when I'm having guy issues, money issues, just life issues in general is when my creativity level is at A thousand...but now that I feel things are under control, I haven't gotten any bad news and I can't complain about a man right now ,I'm lacking in the inspiration department.
Think about it, why do us ladies love some Keyshia Cole and May J blige? Because they connect to us through the pain that we've all felt. This pain is our common denominator. Now we like love songs and happy songs but NOTHING beats a "my man did me wrong song" lol. And many artists reach their greatest creatice peak during times of extreme depression (ex: Picasso).
Now while I'm elated that I am happy in life right now, I am also finding it harder to write blogs.lol. I guess I can make happier posts but I don't wanna feel all preachy. So there might be a slight change in my posts for now....at least until someones pisses me off!
-thats what she said
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So I realized my number is not as low as I thought....but NO its not out of control high either....and my friends are the same way (yeah I had to add them). So we made up a few rules and philosophies about why our number game is what it is.
- If you compare the amount that we slept with to the amount we couldve slept with but didn't. Then the number is significantly lower....comparatively speaking. For example, if about 250 guys wanted to and tried to sleep with you but you've only slept with 13 (not my number) then you've done pretty good....relatively speaking of course
- We are pretty girls, bottom line: we have more options. So basically we've used our resources.lol.
- We are not "girlfriends". We haven't really done the relationship thing. So in place of having one consistent person, we've I guess been testing the waters.lol.
- If you divide the ratio of the men we've been with over the years since we've started having sex, then on an average there were no more than 3 and year.lol
- We've got some "technicals" that we won't count, for example one of my friends said if it was under 2 mins it didn't count...I have a few others...but truthfully some just don't count.
What's a girl to do? So there will be no new ones for me for a loooonnng time. Lol. But you know the saying: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun!!!!!! Well we've had our fun, guess its time to slow it down now.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Walk around the mall or take a look at the couples at the movies and what do you notice, it is few and far between to find a good looking guy and a good looking woman in a relationship together.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Last week, I spoke to a friend who gave me some great advice. First, he told me that I need to learn how to cook because the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Please believe I was on www.amazon.com trying to find the best cookbook to purchase. I figured I also needed to learn how to cook Jamaican food even though I don't care for it. Too many boys out there are saying that they like oxtail ;)
Forgiveness is a topic that has been coming up pretty frequently lately. For some reason I find myself asking for forgiveness as well as being asked for it. It's strange how I can want someone to forgive me but be reluctant to forgive others.
The other day I was asked to forgive someone for literally years of pain and hurt. As much as I wanted to forgive them I found myself not being able to do wholeheartedly. How in the hell can anyone expect to just be forgiven within one phone conversation?! It actually upset me a little that I was even being asked to let everything go right then and there - I sort of took offense to it. After all this time, I had dealt with things in my own way and was dealing with the situation just fine. Now because the person wants to apologize I should just say all is forgiven? I'm not really down with that.
I'm struggling with the fact that life is short and that I cannot fully move on without forgiven this person. But when you feel hurt to your core it's kind of hard to just let it go that easily. I honestly would love to forgive this person. I have asked for the same many MANY times in my life and am very grateful that I was granted forgiveness. I know how much I wanted to be forgiven and able to re-establish a relationship. Unfortunately I don't think I'm ready to fully forgive, I try to act like the situation doesn't affect me but I never stopped hurting. I just hope one day I'll find it in my heart to let it all go...
That's what she said
So last week I met this guy. Immediately I was attracted to him, he was REALLY cute, lets call him X. We ended up exchanging numbers and talking for a few days. By like the third day he asked if he and his friend could stop by to say hello, so I said sure.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
So my other fellow that's what whe said lady feel the same way as I do about the "shorties" sorry but I gots no love for the short guys....I don't think its superfical...I just think its preference.
Now I have a "is this superficial" question:
Is it superficial that I only have/want pretty friends????
I mean I love my friends...and I lobe that they are each uniquely pretty. Also when we go out its a statement...sort of a movement actually. We usually manage to walk in clubs, no lines. We get V.I.P like we paid for it and we just have soooo much fun.
Now I know beauty is in the eye of the beholder but I feel like the reason we can all go out and vacation together and such with no issues is because we are all secure within ourselves.
Like I'm sure if there was an ugly girl in our group she'd be insecure and jealous...and would mess up the group dynamics. But on the other hand I know people who seek out less attractive people so that they can get all the SHINE. I don't think that's right. My whole group shines and so there's no issues.
Now am I superficial for that?
Friday, April 3, 2009
Thursday, April 2, 2009
People really kill me. If every month you have a new group of friends and then they "mysteriously" turn their backs on you at no fault of your own you may need to take a look at yourself.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
If you've been following this blog since day one then you have seen my first post about my (ex) Mr.Big. And especially if you are a personal friend of mines then you already know how I feel about the Mr.Bigs in our lives. In case you all don't know here's a brief description:
Mr.Big: A man who has been in your life that: 1. Is inconsistant;2.highly personable;3. Usually unliked by your friends;4. Extrememly unavailable at times;5. But oh so charming ;6.hard to Get over. All my Sex and the City lovers knows that Chris Noth (Mr. Big) really captured the real life depiction of a Mr. Big relationship.
So for the past 3 years, off and on (mainly off) I've been I guess waiting on Mr. Big to get it together and FINALLY realize that I am Miss RIGHT (riiight.lol). And never the dissapointer, he never did.I am officially not waiting for Big. I know in the movie Carrie and Big were off and on TEN years before they finally wed. Me, I don't want to waste any more time or energy on him.
Now all my ladies with the "Bigs" know that we've been here before. I've "stopped" dealing with him a million times....and this time A million and one is the FINAL time. I'm through and over it.
This time is different because two things: 1. I'm getting older now, I'm not about the cat and chase anymore and I'm done with wasting time and potentially overlooking deserving guys and 2. I've met someone that I like and that likes me back. Its that simple and it is one of the best feeling I've had in a while. When you subtract all the games its soooo much better.
This Big chapter is closed for now, and although it is over, I still have a million (and one) memories that I will always keep, savor and learn from. I guess this experience helped me appreciate the new boo for all that he is....and isn't.
I heard somewhere and please don't quote me, that in tough economical times such as the recession we are currently in, that the price of lipstick and other beauty products actually go on a rise. Why you may ask? Because its is a pick me up.
Now if u tell a guy your interested in the slightest amount of beauty product, they assume that you have some self esteem issues and are uncomfortable with going au naturale. I can only speak for myself but I hate the dreaded make up/beauty/ weave convo that comes up occasionally with members of the opposite sex.
First off there's no winning. I just don't get why we can't just like to accentuate what God and our parents have given us? Why can't we express our mood/style/creativity on our face. Its like we are our own pieces of art. Why when we add on do we have to be looked at as insecure? I mean it is true some people apply makeup heavily and depend on it actually but for myself and most girly girls I know: we just like to have fun. And it is reflected in the way we look.
I'll tell you now I would choose a date with Sephora before A LOT of guys I know.lol. But seriously I feel just about everything in moderation is a good thing. And we are in a recession, and that perfect mascara is just the pick-me-up I need. Somehow I feel guys will still never understand this.
I love when my friends are happy even if im not because happiness is contagious, so if you make my friend happy you are ok in my book, but please dont cross me because my cheerleading (back flips and high kicks) will turn into scorn and boo'ing.
Thats what she said......
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
So I want you guys' opinion on this topic because ya know when it comes to guys/relationships I'm no expert.
So the current "love" interest has a little nickname for me that I don't know how comfortable I'm with. He calls me "old faithful" because he knows if he ever really needed anything, I'm gonna be there. He says its a good thing because I guess it shows I'm reliable and down.
My thing is "old faithful" to me reminds me of that old beat up car that's not really what you want but gets you from A to B. I feel like its that something you may keep around until you upgrade. But I am a woman and we overanalyze and think the worse.
So am I being sensitive? Or does he just need a different expression of appreciation?
Some days you wake up with this feeling of meaning to life. You get up with ease and the world seems to be on your side. Today was my day. I did things I've been meaning to do for a while, I had more motivation than usual and Overall I was just happy...for no reason.
And wouldn't you know that later on in the day I discovered that my Grandfather, whom I love dearly was diagnosed with CANCER. As weird as it seems I wasn't as sad/mad/emotional as I thought I would be ( I knew it was a possibility).
Now why, I thought on a day going so well would I get this horrid news? Because my outlook today was so positive,I was filled with THAT much more faith than I would have had on a regular day. After all cancer does not equal death anymore, he has no expiration date.
But nevertheless, apart of me is still thinking about the other outcome of which I will not speak into the universe. The only thing I know is that everyday I am going to celebrate, appreciate and be thankful for every second that he's here.
Today was a good day though. Ps. Keep him in your prayers guys.
For a long time I was not a believer in second chances. I was the type to erase your number, block you on facebook and aim if you crossed me in the slightest way. However, this pattern left me burning a lot bridges and missing a lot of people.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Saturday, March 28, 2009
and we hope,wish,pray
That he will be Everything...
The ending promised to us
As little girls
When we learned that every story ends
With a Happily Ever After...
I was not a fairy tale girl
And yet still I CRAVE
Something deep...something sweet
But if this special something
Isn't something at all...
I'll know that this was
The SWEETEST little NOTHING
Just how I'm feelin
Thursday, March 26, 2009
while walking out of the car a man in a Dodge Charger rolls down his window and hands my friend a flyer. She doesn't look at the flyer until she enters the restaurant guessing it is for a party, when she does open the flyer it reads:
I need help! I like this guy and I have no idea what to do with that, lol.
He makes me laugh, we have fun together, and things seem so simple and peaceful.
But I'm having some issues 1) I don't know what I want and 2) there's another dude!
What's a girl to do?!? lol.
So I know most people would tell me to figure out what I want first and then plan from there - well how in the hell do i do that? I want a lot, damnit I want my cake and I wanna eat it too! But obviously I can't do that.
Right now the only things I know I want are: to be happy, to have fun, to enjoy my time, and to continue trying to reach my personal goals. Where do either one of these dudes stand in that, I have no clue!
Help . . .
That's What She Said
Im sure this topic has been discussed b4 but i cannot resist.
I CANT STAND LIARS. OMG......i dont get it ...it aggravates me. Not to say I have never a told a lie b4 because honestly sometimes its necessary. However, there are just some lies that people can keep. I think what gets me the most is when people lie about things as if i have no way of finding out the truth. Do u take me for a fool.........i guess so. I cant help but laugh because they went thru all the trouble of lying about something that i could careless about. I find it hilarious that u think i care that much ...lmao. Fellas ......ur not smarter than us [granted there are some DUMB broads out there]. If u think u getting away wit ur lies its cus we let u or we just dont give a damn. MAN UP!!!!!! please ....there is nothing more sorry and pathetic than a dude who lies. If u gone be a pimp own that ish. If u broke just take the L and say so. There is nthn worse than a broke dude tryna fake lik he got it. If u dont want a commitment say so. If u aint really feeling her keep it real. But seriously keep it 100 a woman will respect u so much more trust me.
Im confident that's what she said
In case you haven't noticed many of the recent posts are lacking the signatures you've come to love.
Recently I was talking to some friends about a two different guys that I used to talk to in the past. Both were cute, funny, and genuinely interested in me. When my girls asked why didn't it go further with either one of them I responded, "I could never take him seriously, he's short". They looked at me with disgust and proceeded to tell me how I was superficial.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
So as I write this I am watching Tyra show (guilty pleasure) and she has Steve Harvey, this chick and these other two chicks (wow I'm really paying attention) who all have books out on Relationships.
I don't know about you all but I will NEVER spend 1 penny on a book like that...I admit it is a little intriguing to see all these theories and guidelines...but that is my BIGGEST issue.At this age I am beginning to realize that all the "rules" and "regulations" we once followed are becoming silly.
I feel like in general we do need a few of the basics which are the following: STANDARDS is the main one, I feel like if u don't set them high you'll settle for anything. COMMON SENSE is the second, its important to not let your brain get soooo focused on craving a relationship that you start doing some uncompromising things. Bottomline NEVER compromise your integrity. Also PATIENCE is a virtue! I personally feel like you shouldn't go looking for a relationship, because generally if you are focused on something it will appear...the only problemis you might find a man but most likely he'll be the WRONG one. Instead you just enjoy life and I bet when you least expect it, you'll find someone special. And because men are visual creatures appearance is important.Ladies try to look good: for YOU first and he'll def appreciate the beauty.
So I realized that what this entry first critisized is what I wrote: Relationship Advice!!!! Sue me I'm a hypocrite SO WHAT!lol at least my advice is simple, and free. But I have one last piece before I let you go and that one thing is LOVE YOURSELF!!!!! And I think you'll be OKAY :)
The One and Only
Saturday, March 21, 2009
our final conclusion: relationships will suck the life from your entire existence.
relationships can lead a confident and secure young lady to transform into a psyhco-paranoid-stalker-depressed-emotional-hotmess.com. im so confused @ why people do this to themselves particularly when they are young what is the point. just thinking about it is depressing.
so then u decide u wanna b released from the shackles and put ur single lady swag on just to find ur self to still be a psycho-paranoid-stalker-depressed-emotional-LONELY-hotmess.com. WTF !?!?!?!?! im convinced there is no way win. however i destined to figure this mess out. it seems so simple u meet some u like them they like u ......and the rest is history. but for some reason its never that easy. WHY??????? i hav no idea but when i find out yall will be the 1st to kno.
thats most definately what she said
Friday, March 20, 2009
I came home with a Crush. Something I havent had in years.He is my type to the T. His honesty is refreshing, his accent is charming and I just want more.I can't believe I'm typing this (especially since he knows about the blog).
Its one of those things that bring you back to those highschool days. Sharing secrets on the phone, reminiscing on the SHORT time we spent together....AND guess what? He lives far far away! Just My Luck!
Well at least its the same coast. Anyways,as of now we are working out a way to see each other and see what happens. You know us ladies like to jump to conclusions but I'm happy right now just being happy TODAY, who knows what tomorrow will bring.
Honestly who knows where this goes but for the time being its So Very refreshing.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
So we are back from MIA...all tanned and beautiful. Trust, we didn't want to leave and face reality. But before we begin talkin about our trip, let me tell you of a situation that has already occurred. So my boo thing hits me up yesterday. Here is the convo as follows:
Monday, March 16, 2009
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Most people like to clean out their homes of all the junk from the previous year.I like to do a little bit of cleaning in my space BUT more importantly, around this time or a little earlier than now I do some People Cleansing.
This is a time to get rid of all the dead weight people around with no real significance. A close friend of mines just went through a situation in which her family was the root of all her issues and causing too much unnecessary drama. My advice was for her to put herself and happiness first. Eventually she has let go and in the process of letting go all the extras she has found a new found freedom and strength I think.Now family is a touchy subject because you only get one BUT for the sake of one's own sanity sometimes you have to cut them off and hope that one day they can get it together.
Its a process of editing.the most important part of it is to NOT feel guilty. As I mentioned in a previous post, some people are seasonal and its important to not hold onto a person just because there is history. Its okay to let go and just keep the good memories without keeping the dead weight. And sometimes you outgrow relationships and once again its time to let them go. And this is for men,women,family, co workers, whatever.
It is equally important to not just put everyone on the chopping block.I'm not advising you to let a person go the at first sign of adversity. Sometimes you should give people a chance but of course not too many. And of course some people are just permanent and irreplacable. These are the people you keep for your sanity.
Soooo have you done any cleaning lately?
Friday, March 6, 2009
For my ego’s sake I would kind of like to know if he is interested, but at the same time I just know there would be absolutely no point in ever saying anything to him or making a move (because of various circumstances), instead I’ll just continue to crush on him
That’s what she said
Posted by: Miss Boss
Thursday, March 5, 2009
where were u last night i called you
-i know i couldnt find my phone
what? how can u not find ya phone
-i was done off the patron & some kush
mmmm soo where was the party at???
-um in my living room with the flat screen and sports center
i can't, have a productive morning
-i am, already up cooking breakfast and smoking a blunt
I CANT LADIES
OUR SISTER FROM ANOTHER (KEYSHIA) SAID IT BEST
"LET IT GO"
THERE ARE NO WORDS TO DESCRIBE THIS
I WOULD SAY SHAMBLES
BUT THIS IS A STEP FURTHER
MAYBE "MAN DOWN" "CODE 10" "WE HAVE A PROBLEM AMERICA" "I NEED TO CHECK MY ITINERARY"
"WONT BE ABLE TO DATE HIM, HE CANT GET RIGHT" "ABSOUETLEY NOT"
"MOOMMMA THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID" WOULD THROW HER SHOE AT ME FOR EVEN CONVERSING WIT THIS HUMAN (THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID "HUMAN" )
ALL N ALL I JUST HAD TO SHARE THAT
I HAVE SOME MORE CONFESSIONS OF THIS HUMAN
BUT IT WILL COMEIN DUE TIME
5DAYS TIL I GO ON THE SEARCH FOR THE BIG BOSS RICK ROSS AND MAKE A DUO SINGLE WIT HIM
FELLAS "HERE I AM"
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
It has been a ridiculously hectic three weeks, but luckily I finally have one day where I can breathe, so on this off day I decided why not talk to you all. (I miss you, I really do!) and I know your guessing whats been going on with me so why not share =)
1. Since the Black man shows absolutely no love and/or appreciation for me(and because they are so quick to talk to everyone else besides the damn sistahs) I decided to try "Something New". So I've been talking to my friends about dating outside of our race and many (5 out of 7) have said that they love Black men too much to deviate. Now before you get ready to chop my neck off, don't get me wrong I love Black men as well but I figured Id give something else a try. So here's how it unfolded: I was on U street on one of my random walks only to be interrupted by an excuse me; thinking I was just in his way I moved to the side but he just stood there. So I'm like what the heck is this guys deal and he smiles and introduces himself as "Jason". At this point I was definetly still clueless but when he started talking I was like wait is he trying to holla at me? Needless to say after a few minutes and a compliment or two he asked for my number and text me that evening with a simple, "You're beautiful". Now Ive heard it all, but something about the word beautiful made me smile and we have been hanging out ever since. First outing was cool and anyone who knows me knows I love good food and sightseeing and thats exactly what we did, Second time around we hit a local bar for some drinks and dessert, the third time we came to my place (popcorn & a movie)...and we're still going strong. The conversation is awesome, I adore his style, and he is funny as hell, so I'm gonna keep him around.......guess I'll just have to wait and see.
2. Girls Girl Girls. Im gonna keep this one short cause if I don't I'll be talking forever. Someone who I thought was a very dear friend of mine BLAZED(i.e. played) me! Now, it takes alot for me to trust someone, like seriously alot, but as I stated before I have been working on that need for me to keep myself so secretive. I've been friends with the person for a little over four years now and talk about someone who I really thought was my twin. Needless to say our falling out has led me to revert to Queen Bee's post. Some people are seasonal....and she definetly was.
3. So I'm not sure if you all remember that young nigga who I thought would "sweep me off my feet". LOL. negative. He has been nothing but headache and I finally ditched his ass to the curb, only after he called me an evil bitch. Smh. Jonathan dont be so salty sweety.
4. Last but certainly not least. I have been on my Kanye's workout plan. 11 weeks left until graduation! woohooo. So you know Juicy has to look amazing.....
FYI: I promise to never keep you guys from whats been going on with me ever again. LOL.
Till Next Time
Monday, March 2, 2009
I have men issues.Most women do.And I titled this "Say what you need to say" because myself and countless other women don't communicate properly and effectively with the men they like and the men they don't like.
I, For one tried to just treat them all the same...BUT they are not all the same. They are not objects or toys (or comparable to food or shoes). They are individuals.
I envy men with the ability to keep it moving without any feelings. I tried and was successful a few times, however deep down I'm not like that.I can't keep it moving on everyone. That's just a recipe for a miserable, lonely old strange woman with 16 cats knitting in a rocking chair (lol). Or even worse: the BITTER BLACK WOMAN. I don't want to become that woman. I do believe in GOOD BLACK MEN.
I think this whole player lifestyle I've been living may have to rest because honestly I'm over it. I been there and done that. I don't like people playing games with me and so I won't play games in return.At the end of the day its still pretty lonely no matter how many men there are (which aren't even that many)
At the same time for ME to open up the gates and say"welcome come on in, feel free to hurt me"is hard. I guess I shouldn't always feel like someone is going to hurt me, BUT the last time I did let my guards down, that was the result and still is sometimes.
Nevertheless I am fully aware that I need to make some changes.Its called GROWTH and its a PROCESS.
Well that's what I needed to say and get off my chest