Wednesday, April 8, 2009

When Opposites Attract

Walk around the mall or take a look at the couples at the movies and what do you notice, it is few and far between to find a good looking guy and a good looking woman in a relationship together. 

Here's my theory as to why. 

Attractive men are used to being picked up by girls. As early as middle school they were the cute boy that all the girls liked and flocked to. The girls they ended up with were the girls who pursued them the most and made them feel the best about themselves. This middle school early high school stage is when this young man would have otherwise been developing his "game". However, this never became nessacary for him because the girls did all the work for him all he had to do was sit back and be cute. 

On the other side of the hallways the same thing was happening to the pretty little girls in the class. All the boys were chasing them around gassing their heads about how pretty they are. These "pretty" girls never had to develop the wit and skills nessacary to find a guy and keep his interest. 

So at the end of the day, the attractive guys are used to the relationship being all about them and have no game to pick up women while the pretty girls want it to be all about them and have no desire to go after guys

OF COURSE there are exceptions to these findings and those exceptions usually come in the form of late bloomers. If you didn't become "cute" until senior year of highschool or after you are in luck, you still have the game you learned in your not so cute days and now you have the looks to go along with it.

Just something that I've been noticing

thats what she said

I know I'm hatin in the picture but I just can't help it

Monday, April 6, 2009

Just be thoughtful.

Last week, I spoke to a friend who gave me some great advice. First, he told me that I need to learn how to cook because the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Please believe I was on trying to find the best cookbook to purchase. I figured I also needed to learn how to cook Jamaican food even though I don't care for it. Too many boys out there are saying that they like oxtail ;) 

But wait...I don't want a man. At least, I don't think so. Yet, I was very eager to go online and purchase a cookbook so I can learn how to cook for "my man".. Interesting? Who the hell am I cooking for in the first place?  I told him "i can't cook..why can't we just order take-out?".  He said it isn't about the actual food. He said it is about the "thought". The idea that a girl put in all that work into trying to make him smile. I guess this girl's "thoughtfulness" influenced him so much that he forgot that he hated feet and gave her a foot massage without her asking him to. 

The point of the story is thoughtful (also learn how to cook). Try to make someone you like smile. Do something for them that you wouldn't do for anyone else. You don't have to spend money on them  but do something that shows them that you think and care about them. Most importantly, if he cares for you just as much as you care for him, then your hard work will be reciprocated. If he doesn't feel the same desire to make you smile, then leave him alone. 

At the end of the day, I don't think I am looking for a man. Instead, I just want someone who will make me smile. Someone who is genuinely thoughtful. It makes him happy to know that I am happy.

Most importantly, I want someone that I can make smile.  

...thats what she said. 

To forgive or not forgive...

Forgiveness is a topic that has been coming up pretty frequently lately. For some reason I find myself asking for forgiveness as well as being asked for it. It's strange how I can want someone to forgive me but be reluctant to forgive others.

The other day I was asked to forgive someone for literally years of pain and hurt. As much as I wanted to forgive them I found myself not being able to do wholeheartedly. How in the hell can anyone expect to just be forgiven within one phone conversation?! It actually upset me a little that I was even being asked to let everything go right then and there - I sort of took offense to it. After all this time, I had dealt with things in my own way and was dealing with the situation just fine. Now because the person wants to apologize I should just say all is forgiven? I'm not really down with that.

I'm struggling with the fact that life is short and that I cannot fully move on without forgiven this person. But when you feel hurt to your core it's kind of hard to just let it go that easily. I honestly would love to forgive this person. I have asked for the same many MANY times in my life and am very grateful that I was granted forgiveness. I know how much I wanted to be forgiven and able to re-establish a relationship. Unfortunately I don't think I'm ready to fully forgive, I try to act like the situation doesn't affect me but I never stopped hurting. I just hope one day I'll find it in my heart to let it all go...

That's what she said

No Words Needed

photos courtesy of

True Life: She's Just Not That Into You

So last week I met this guy. Immediately I was attracted to him, he was REALLY cute, lets call him X. We ended up exchanging numbers and talking for a few days. By like the third day he asked if he and his friend could stop by to say hello, so I said sure.

As soon as he walked through the door something was off to me. I'm very particular about what I like and I know it when I see it. So its not that he wasn't cute anymore I just knew at that time he WAS NOT my type. 

Anyways, I say hello and head for the couch to sit down. He sits next to me and after about 35 seconds I text my friend who is also sitting in the room. The text message reads: "I don't like him anymore". However, I accidentally sent the message to X. As soon as I realized the mistake I made my mouth dropped and I immediately reached across and tried to grab his phone and plead with him to let me erase the message I accidentally sent him. He said no, so me being the punk I am, ran upstairs and hid my embarrassed face in a pillow lol.

About 30 seconds later he comes upstairs and gives me my phone while saying "I'm going to give you a few minutes to get your lies together"

In the meantime my friends are clueless as to what just happened and as I text them the situation (from upstairs) I can hear them hold back their laughter. 

So I stayed upstairs for another 5 minutes hoping he would leave and I wouldn't have to face the situation...I was wrong

He came back upstairs a few minutes and says "you're lucky I'm not insecure or else I would have thought you were talking about me".

I guess that was a good way for him to play it off, I guess, and I guess that the akward lies I said to go along with what he already assumed in his mind we're convincing, I guess, and I guess the forced conversation that we had for the next 20 minutes until he finally left could leave him convinced that I wasn't talking about him, I guess, but I'm also guessing that when he sees this post he'll know what's up

double check those texts ladies

thats what she said 

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Am I superficial? part 3...

So my other fellow that's what whe said lady feel the same way as I do about the "shorties" sorry but I gots no love for the short guys....I don't think its superfical...I just think its preference.

Now I have a "is this superficial" question:
Is it superficial that I only have/want pretty friends????

I mean I love my friends...and I lobe that they are each uniquely pretty. Also when we go out its a statement...sort of a movement actually. We usually manage to walk in clubs, no lines. We get V.I.P like we paid for it and we just have soooo much fun.

Now I know beauty is in the eye of the beholder but I feel like the reason we can all go out and vacation together and such with no issues is because we are all secure within ourselves.

Like I'm sure if there was an ugly girl in our group she'd be insecure and jealous...and would mess up the group dynamics. But on the other hand I know people who seek out less attractive people so that they can get all the SHINE. I don't think that's right. My whole group shines and so there's no issues.

Now am I superficial for that?